Mark (Allen) Vreeland Home Page

About Me

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This is the page where I'll  tell you probably more about me than you really want to know.
 
Something to remember: This is MY life, not yours.  I'm not asking anyone to fit into my life and I am not saying that I am still doing the same things that I talk about in this section.  This is historical to date.  If you wish to know about my intended future, please click on "my aspirations." 

I made this Homepage in outline form so that you can easily access any part that may interest you the most. I do hope that you will spend some time reading it all since you might recognize a part that reminds you of yourself. Isn't that what life's about...learning about yourself through your reactions to others.

My childhood: The early years

My father told me that he knew I was born when he heard me screaming all way down the hospital hallway. After all, only HIS kid could make such a racket. I still am loud today.

I walked to elementary school along the side of the creek where I grew up on the boarder of Los Gatos and San Jose. It was a mile each way (Yes, up hill, both ways, and in the snow :). I loved the exercise; walking and bicycling in general. Seeing all the new sights along the creek. School was easy and I didn't take it, or much of anything else very seriously. I always thought that most schooling up to college level, is glorified babysitting , and if they intensely taught me, I could learn what I needed to know for the entire day in about 15 minutes. What I didn't know was this was the future telling me about my life. 

Me Physically:

I am 5'11" tall approx 195 lbs. Mostly muscle: waist 35" chest 44". I'm not built for speed, but for power. I usually work out 2-3 times a week lifting weights and aerobics for a total of just over an hour. I am in better condition than when I was in my mid 20's. I have endurance to hike or whatever all day long. I like feeling so youthful. I hope I can keep it going for many more years. I have all my own teeth and own hair. : )

I'm handsome, if fact, if I was more handsome, people would think I'm gay. :) I'm intelligent. I have a 137 IQ. Smart enough to do the job but not too much of a brainiac. I am a straight divorced man.

I have had about 10 years of living as a single person. How time flies when you're having fun! I am looking for a long term relationship with a person who is easy going, low maintenance, and can be flexible since I have a unique lifestyle. (see what I do for a living below).

I am an easy going person. I usually wear workout shorts and a tee shirt and cross training shoes. I dislike getting dressed up in a tie. Even though I do get very GQ looking. I am basically a Caribbean person living in Silicon Valley.
 
Things I Won't Do:
 
1.  An evening at the ballet.
2.  Skydiving. 
3.  "Extreme" sports actually designed to injur or kill.
4.  Nasty hard drugs...Please don't even bring them around me.
5.  Disloyal to my friends/loved ones.
6.  Compromise my integrity
 
You will most probably NOT like me if:
 
1.  The terms "fabulous" and/or "perfect" are used by you almost daily.
2.  You think "skinny dipping" is for kids and definitely not you.
3.  Materialism is more important than people to you.
4.  You have competition issues with your neighbors/friends.
5.  Fame is important to you.
6.  Your life is totally multitasking AND you like it that way.
 
One thing you NEVER have to ask me:
 
What am I thinking.  I am a very open person and you will know what I think and How I feel about things...including you!  
 
My Philosophy of life:

There is an optimum for everything. The trick is: Finding where the optimim is, and the optimum is constantly moving. I live by the "golden rule". I don't lie, cheat, steal, to the best of my ability. It just makes life easier. I'm honest, open, and blunt. Overly for some people who are reserved and have issues in that area. I'll say what is on my mind.
  
I am an Altruist...one who unselfishly promotes the welfare of others. As long as they will also help themselves out at the same time. 
 
I live by another saying: "Negative emotions are a manifestation of a misinterpretation of reality". This boils down to: If I am angry, I have to accept that I had something to do with my getting that way. I find that this is the hardest concept for people to understand. Their anger gets in the way of their possibly understanding that their actions (or inactions) up to this point, led up to every event in their life happening.
 
I recently watched the movie "American Beauty" as well as watched a few TV shows like "E.L.Raymond" and "Yes Dear". I noticed "The Honeymooners" which was probably the first big show to portray men as afraid of their women.  Is this fear because their mothers were the primary disciplinarian when they were growing up? 
 
It seems to me, the person who one would least like to be afraid of is your relationship.  How can you have quality intimacy with someone you are afraid of?  If you are afraid of your relationship, how can she respect you as being a man?  I have had a great relationship with my mother and I love women.  Fear and women are not in the same "book" to me.
 
I am totally pro choice when it comes to a woman's right to choose.  This doesn't mean to use abortion as a primary means of contraception.  More like if all else fails, this should be the right of every woman. I also think the "morning after" pill should be distributed by any pharmacy free of charge as well as handed out in schools. I'm willing to have my tax $ go for that more than maintaining presence in Iraq.
 
Arguments:
 
I have opinions. Yet, at the same time I am the most open minded person I know.  This doesn't mean that I am "right".  Everything is on a sliding continuum and there is no such thing as "right".  In my personal life, rarely do I have an argument.  My reasoning is that nobody "wins" an argument and the closest a person can come to "winning" an argument " is to be the first to apologize. Both parties have responsibility. You loose your power when you raise your voice in an argument. 
 
Drugs and Alcohol: 

I have never used "hard" drugs. I don't care if someone ever used hard drugs in their lives.  I know of very few people (if any) that haven't tried them.  I just don't want them as a way of my life.
 
I drink 2-4 drinks a month. Lately it's been Infused Mango martini's at Steamer's in LG.  I drank alone 3-4 times in my life and I didn't like it. To me, it is a social thing. I 've partied twice at the Bomba Shack on Tortola at the full moon party. They claim to have "mushroom punch"...all I know is I had a great time and I'm definitely going back!  FLASH!!! I went back to Bomba Shack 7-10-06 and the punch was lame at best.  Avoid it and take a cooler of beers/bottled drinks with you to leave in your car.  No use paying $4/drink for orange juice with some maybe dark rum poured in.
 
The Sex-Love Connection:
 
I believe that love is very important in life. I have never had sex with someone I didn't have loving feelings for and I have never been to a prostitute. For me, sex is only good with someone I love or at least have strong loving feelings for.
 
I think sex is both fun and funny. Obviously it was made to be enjoyable. I can't understand why people take it so seriously. Sometimes just "going for it" is great. Other times, some adventure is the BEST!
 
With the right person, just comfortable loving is the BEST.  I am a cuddler after sex. I call it "afterplay." Falling asleep in each others arms afterwords is great by me, even though I am usually the last one to fall asleep.
 
I like a woman that is not too big (A, B, or C cup size) on top. A "Double D" cup can be just too much. Most of this depends on the frame of a woman.  What I can't understand is a petite woman that goes from a B cup to a double D with implants.  This is usually a gross disfigurement as well as a lifetime of hassles with bra straps digging into her shoulders and back pain.
 
I am a very passionate man.  I like intimate sex at least 3 times a week for a night/afternoon/evening of loving.  I enjoy the intimacy of quality TIME spent together.  
 
Relationships:
 
I live by the "Golden rule of relationships."  That is: Never do something that you wouldn't do in front of your wife/girlfriend....  It takes the guesswork out of relationships and makes everyone happy.
 
What I read: 
 
Fact over fiction. Pure and simple. I just love learning. Be it the History channel, or a book, or the Internet. Knowledge is power and it makes life much more enjoyable and easier. Learning is my hobby. Sharing knowledge with others is an enjoyment.
 
What I do for a living:

I am an Investor/Professional Manager. Apartment complexes, Securities, whatever will make me a good return on my money.
I really like swing trading and make very good money doing such. It's an activity I do when I have the time and desire. Which hasn't been lately. It's good money for  little work even though a bit stressful at times.

My work day consist of about 6-20 phone calls, dealing with managers, teaching employees how to perform their tasks better or more efficiently, dealing with attorneys and legal matters, socializing with friends, handling paperwork, more paperwork, banking, meetings with accountants, dealing with vendors, making multi thousand dollar decisions several times a day. 

I love public speaking and went to Toastmasters about a year ago and won the "best speech ribbon" even though I was a guest and had no speech prepared. 

I mostly quit working for a year when I was 29. I got bored and wanted to get back into the race. I'm glad I did. I love the challenge of making and running a well oiled machine. Still I'm selling all my apartment complex investments in 2007 and getting out of the business.  It's time to move on to something new.

On being me:
 
I am realizing the scope of being me. I have a life like no other person I know. I don't have a 9 to 5 job. I work out of my home so I have no concept of a commute time or just how bad rush hour can be.
 
I dropped off a friend's kid at high school recently and I never knew about the gridlock surrounding schools.  I walked to school along the creek since I was in 4th grade.  Now, you are a "bad mom" if you don't drive "jr" to school until they drive themselves?  What is wrong with this world? Perhaps this over parenting has gone a bit too far. 
 
I don't have to dress up or even shower to work until I leave my office around 1:00 and I'm back home or visiting a friend by 3-4 including taking a lunch.
 
I am often in my robe until I shower, doing my paperwork and phone calls. I travel for fun and relaxation. I usually vacation for 4 to 8 weeks a year. 
 
Most people who know me well, either wish they were me or they were my dog. Being my dog is a very good life!
 
A few things that you might wish to know about me:

I have never been arrested or in trouble with the law (besides a few traffic tickets). I am tenacious as hell when something is worth my time. I wear size 11 shoes. Yes, I color my hair to get rid of some of the gray. I started getting gray hair in my late 20's. I am healthier now than I was when I was in my 20's. I am well endowed. I have no STD that I know of. I was part of a test of a vaccine to prevent Herpes since my "ex" had them and I didn't wish to get them. I never got Herpes...looks like the vaccination worked. :)
 
I usually go to sleep around 11 and get up out of bed between 7 and 8. I wake up around 7 to 8 am on weekends and sit in bed for a while reading the morning newspaper. I usually spend 30 minutes +/- listening to the radio, or watching the news while hanging with my dog. If time permits, I watch Regis and Kelly for 15 minutes.  The first 15 minutes of their show is the best daytime tv going. I'm not an addict about this.  We are talking 1-2 times/week.  
 
I get the San Jose newspaper Friday -Sunday and read/flip through some if it while still in bed. I've trained my dog to get the paper since my driveway is 350' up hill and I don't like to make that walk first thing in the am. Especially when it's raining. Labs love the rain.  Isn't life wonderful.
 
I LOVE to take a shower...once or twice a day.  I love to sing in the shower. Yes, I usually sing. To take a shower is like being reborn.

I wipe off the glass shower door when I finish showering (3 seconds). It makes it nicer between times the housekeeper comes (every other week). I am clean but living is such a small home, (1100 sq ft.) I tend to be cluttered in such a small area.
 
I have not used the clothes dryer in 3+ years.  I always have other clothes I can wear and it takes only a day to line dry them. (two days in winter).  This, and some household recycling, is what I do for the environment which has been so good to me.  I'm not against machine drying but why when it's so easy to line dry?  Do we really need to have everything done so fast all the time?

I'm generous with my friends but I love to get a great deal! I've bought two stereos because they were a great deals. I gave one to a friend.  I never pay much over $300 to fly anywhere in the USA. A little Internet search will usually get me there for less.

My Picture

This picture was taken about 2 years ago. I've had eye surgery since then. Was it "elective surgery"?  Well maybe.  I just had too much skin above my eyes and it kept me from seeing a full field of vision.  I could lift up the eyelids with my finger and see about 33% more area.  So, I had it done.  Never have I been more delighted. I had some extra fat taken from below my eyes while the Dr was at it to eliminate the puffiness. 

Some things I really like about me:
 
People who really know me and have been in my life for many years, say I am one of the best people they have ever met.  I enhance the lives of the people I know and love.

I'm honest, Trustworthy, I love to negotiate. I love banter amongst friends.  Let's talk and get all out ideas out on the table all at once.   Interruption is totally appreciated!  I am a great communicator and listener. I tell others when I'm wrong and I'm sorry.
 
I love to ride Motorcycles. My favorite is a dual sport Honda 2001 XR650L. I had the White Brother's high performance kit installed and it's a "thrill to ride".
I own three other bikes that I love to ride and other people like to learn to ride on. Ice block sliding on Halloween night in the park, Snorkeling, Scuba diving, Jet skiing (I have a high preformance Blaster). I love driving my Eddie Bauer Explorer. I still have a classic 67 Mercedes 230SL...Red of course!
 
I feel totally at home in the Caribbean waters. Swimming, snorkeling, scuba, or sailing.  The warmth of the water along with it's turquoise color and the bright sunshine, palm trees, the overall "happy to be alive music" makes it feel more like a personal "home" than any other place. I haven't been to all the islands and don't have any desire to go to Haiti, but even on the Mexican coast, it all has that magical feeling.  
 
There is a kart racing place in Santa Clara which you can race against friends. This is very fun! Sangria and Mexican food, eating outside is a great way to spend a warm weekend afternoon!

Some of My Favorite Things

Movies:
 
I've got to keep the "movie" part of this page to actors that are alive today or there will be a whole other page that will be lengthy.  You can't discount Bogart and Bacall, Astaire, Hepburn, Tracy ..the list just goes on.  Ask me if you have questions.
 
"The Green Mile", "The Usual Suspects", "The Sixth Sense", " American Beauty", Most anything with John Wayne (post 1954) (my favorite is "The Quite Man"), Tommy Lee Jones, or Anthony Hopkins in it,  "Moonstruck" (yes 1987 with Cher and Nick Cage. If you believe in going after love, and enjoy the New York-Italian setting, you got to like this film), "Fight Club", "Crash" & "American History X" (two powerful films that should be shown yearly in all middle schools and above),  Edward Norton is also a very good actor. Kevin Spacey is remarkable, Robert Downey can be incredible if he's let off his tight leash. Any guy that doesn't like Jack Nicholson is just nuts.
 
Women actors:  Yes, I like most of Merril Streep films, Shirley Mc Lane is a great actress, Judi Dench, Glenn Close, Charlize Theron, (pulled off an intense miracle in "Monster") Ashley Judd (someone that can light up a room with her presence just can't have a dark interior), and several others .  There are some "up and comers" but they have to make a few more movies to get into my book as great actors. 
 
One thing: Julia Roberts really didn't deserve the Oscar for Erin Brockovich.  It was one of those years where the competition was lame.
You might notice that there are few "sex symbols" on my list.  "Sexy" does not an actor make. It takes a multitude of movies showing the variety of abilities.
 
I find that I really enjoy a film if it engages me emotionally. That is, I may have a few tears running down my cheeks during the film as well as laughter.  It's nice to feel the "humanity" that goes with these feelings.
 
A perfect example of a good film that I didn't get emotionally involved with is the Matrix,  Matrix 2....  Frankly, the effects were good but I could care less about any of the characters.  I just hope they would quickly die and the movie would be over so I could leave. I've haven't seen #3 and probably won't bother. 
 
Also, when did some divine being state there has to be this Kung Fu crap in a movie to make it good?  You will notice that NONE of my favorite actors have had roles with that crap in it.  
 
My "life theme" movie would have to be "Pay it Forward" (Kevin Spacey and Helen Hunt)...typical for an Altruist.  This is a "must see" movie for all of us and like "Crash" and "American History X", it should be shown to all middle and above school kids on a yearly basis. Let's appreciate our varied ethnicities instead of practicing moronic prejudice based on untrue and outdated stereotypes.

"Crash" & "American History X" should be shown and followed immediately with a discussion afterwords of how we can all learn to live with people who are different than us on the exterior and how everyone has something good to offer.
 
My overall favorite quote:
 
"Never underestimate the power of denial"  "Ricky Fitts" from "American Beauty"

My favorite tv shows:
 
The Soprano's, Sex and the City,  2 1/2 men, Some of  Dr. Phil.  I really like Dr. Phil's direct no nonsense get down to it approach to life management. Basically, you know what's wrong, now take care of it or keep sitting in your crap and shut up about it! I only watch about one of his shows a month.  It seems the same issues are at stake here....  Just varied circumstances..  Lately,  I've been into "The Shield".  This show ROCKS!  Of course, CSI is interesting at times.

I don't have cable or HBO so I Watch The Soprano's and Sex and the City on DVD when they come out. We get some people together and have a rainy day marathon of the show. Lots of fun and I like the show more since it's fresh in my mind what happened in the previous episodes. "Seinfeld" is one of my all time favorite television shows.
 
My favorite music:
 
This is a bit more difficult to convey. Music taste reflects where the soul is at. Right now I am listening to Rock and Roll, Last week I was listening to some of the old Beatles stuff. Next week I'm into Progressive rock. I listen to classic rock 98.5, or 105.3 and 104.9 for contempory. 
 
B-Tribe and Enigma are good for sexual background music. I'm all over the place when it comes to Music.  I feel it is suppose to enhance your mood rather than make it. Bocelli's latest is very good. I keep buying 2-3 and giving them away.
 
My favorites foods:
 
Mexican, Italian, French, Chinese, Infusion, The great American Hamburger, a good steak or seafood. I'm not too much into Indian or sushi. I like to eat protein. I'm definitely NOT a vegetarian.
 
My favorite clothes:
 
Shorts and a cotton tee shirt.  Or nothing but a robe and slippers.  I clean up very well and look great in a suit but it's not my idea of comfortable. Dress me up an I jump to a "9" on the "10 scale" in a flash.
 
My Favorite Shoes:
 
Timberland, Merrill, and Rockport make a great athletic shoe that last well over a year.  Their exchange policy is open and easy.  They spend their $ on quality instead of hiring some stupid basketball player to sell the shoe making you pay more for the shoe than it's worth. Bang for the buck; Nike sucks! 
 
Dress shoes: French Shriners in black. I also have a couple pair of brown woven leather casual/dress shoes and several pair of insulated work/motorcycle riding boots that I almost never wear.
 
Some other things I like in random order:
 
Scrunchies at times.  Women in pony tails show their necks which can be sexy.  A woman's neck is very sexy. Sort of like a plunging neckline.  They just say to the world " I'm sexy and I know it" 
 
My idea of Sexy dress is denim shorts and a white/pastel lightweight tight tank(ish) top OR the "Little Black Dress"...both are a complete distraction to getting things done.  I'll admit it....I got tongue tied.  It hasn't been for awhile.  But it has happened! :) 
   
Dirty Blond to Brunette hair.  Redhead (fire engine red) is just not my thing.  Platinum blonde isn't either...Yikes! 
 
A woman that is a "snuggle bunny"...likes to spend time in bed talking while cuddling.